I once heard that every woman needs five kinds of friends in her life. There is a childhood friend who knows absolutely everything about you. Then there is the friend who mirrors your life. You get married, have children and reach major milestones at the same time. You have that fabulous friend who stretches you beyond anything you believed was possible. There’s your work bestie and finally, that one special friend who is your go-to, your confidant. She’s the one person you pour your heart out to and keeps every last one of your secrets.
What if, magically, there’s that one beautiful human being that’s all those friends wrapped up in one?
I was 14 years old when I first met Tracy. She was 16, glamorous, sophisticated, and everything I wanted to be. With long blonde hair and a beaming smile, she was the most popular girl I knew.
Tracy took me under her wing; she gave me confidence and made me feel like I was cool. She taught me everything I needed to know about unconditional friendship and love. I never imagined this bond would continue for decades. Our friendship survived men, marriages and tremendous loss. It even thrived as we had babies, children, teenagers, and more recently, grandchildren.
She was fun and bigger than life in a glittery sort of way. If she loved you, you were more than a charm that she adored. We had a silent pact. She watched over me and I was her protector. No one was ever able to cross her if within my reach. If I heard something unpleasant, I would step in and shrink them down to size, because she was my girl.
Super Disorganized People
Tracy always kept me laughing. As much as I loved this happy, spicy & lovable soul, she had one small flaw… she couldn’t tell time! So I nicknamed her spacey Tracy. Once she even showed up at an awards dinner that she was being honored at a full day early (after getting dressed, hair and makeup
So, you’re charming and lovable and can carry on a conversation with anyone, anywhere at any time. All is good with the world except you missed your flight to Paris and now you’ll miss your friend’s wedding. You are meeting friends for dinner but the restaurant won’t seat the party until everyone is there and you’re running 20 minutes late. Since you forgot to send in the school forms, it’s too late for your daughter to join the lacrosse team. Your bills are paid late, your handbag looks like a war zone, and you still have boxes to unpack though you moved eight months ago.
You miss deadlines, forget birthdays, and your roots are starting to show badly. Your refrigerator smells like everything has expired and you have so many junk drawers you can’t find a thing. You keep buying new sheets because you don’t have time to do the wash and you bring your clothes to the thrift shop but they refuse them. This may not be exactly about you, but it is exactly about people that need organization, just like my tardy friend.
Why Are You Super Disorganized?
Super disorganized people move through the world differently. They have a different style, a different pace, a different mindset. They go to that place of inner chaos when a task is overwhelming or time-consuming. You’d rather be doing something else? I don’t blame you but then disorganization multiplies and you have no idea where to begin.
A Thousand Myths
The impact of disorganization on everyone else is downright frustrating. It’s more than not responding to emails, texts or forgetting to show up (or showing up on the wrong day or wrong time). It’s a series of myths and excuses that get old by day two.
Here are 4 examples:
I know that my desk and chair are piled with stacks of papers and books. But I know where everything is and can find it if I need it. (Maybe, 25 minutes later.)
I’m running late because of traffic. (You’re running late because you’re running late and you didn’t leave enough time, plus an extra 15 minutes for the unexpected, to get to your appointment.)
It’s not my fault. There were too many obstacles or a series of distractions, or others taking me hostage and sabotaging my time. (It may not be your fault but how you turn it around and find solutions is the difference between super organized and super disorganized.)
I don’t have time. Who does? Most of us are overworked, overstressed and sometimes feel on the verge of collapse. Still, if you want something done you ask a busy person because they know how to navigate their time. And, people do make time for the things they really want to do, don’t they? Such as celebrating birthdays, talking to and spending time with friends. At least we should because it’s the best part of life. If it’s important to you, you’ll find the time.
The Truth is
Life isn’t perfect, things do go wrong, we’re only human and we can have bad days. It can happen to anyone and everyone. It only becomes an issue when it becomes a habit. Habits can be entanglements that are really hard to climb out of and break away from.
Reasons You Just Can’t Get Organized
So, disorganization is no longer working for you? Most people decide it’s time to get organized when they’ve had it up to “here” so to speak. Life is overwhelming; you can’t get things done, find what you’re looking for or get to appointments on time. I assure you,
It’s All about Prioritizing
Correct me if I’m wrong, but maybe this sounds just like you? Your to-do list is longer than the novel you still haven’t gotten around to finishing yet. And, you add more to it about 20 times a day. The overwhelming number of commitments on it is starting to make you nervous. And, it feels as if your mind has to focus on a million different things at once. This is
You Don’t Have the Right Tools
We live in a modern era full of handy tools, apps, and technology that make all our lives easier. Use this tool to help you along your organizational journey. It doesn’t matter what tools you use, as long as you find ones that work for you. Download an app that allows you to schedule your priorities, use the timer on your phone to help you keep track of the time, or even use online mind maps to break down tasks into smaller manageable chunks.
Procrastination is Real
Let me guess, you tend to put off things today thinking you’ll get to it tomorrow? The problem with procrastination is that you have other things to do which also gets moved along. Procrastination is probably the worst kind of disorganization and the effects seep into everything. This persistent problem is usually caused by uncertainty (you don’t know how to do it or how to get started), shifted priorities (you’d rather be doing something else) or fear (fear of failure). Just for a moment, think about this, try projecting yourself into the future. Consider how you will feel in the future if you do something now compared to if you don’t do it. Once you understand it from this perspective, your present self may just want to help your future self by not procrastinating.
A Multitasking Frenzy
Here’s a reality buster, multitasking does not mean organized. Actually, trying to multitask is impossible (well, for tasks that require you to be mentally focused). Stop trying to do everything at once. Rather, simplify your life by doing one thing at a time. By giving a task all your attention, you can get it done faster and better.
Systemless is Your Thing
Organized people think differently. They create systems that work for them. Having a personal navigation system is a game-changer. It helps you to manage an endless list of to do’s that can rattle you to the core if you’re super disorganized. The best thing to do is to find simple solutions. Systems that are easy to implement and that provide you with solutions that work for you. Such as a basket or envelope that holds current receipts, a hook for kids to hang their coats on and a place to store items used daily such as keys, pens, and your wallet.
You Are a Creature of Clutter
You know this is you if every surface in your house or office is full of stuff. There are piles stacked just about everywhere and they keep toppling over. Clutter is chaos and the ultimate sign of disorganization. Make your organizational journey easier by minimizing.
Keep Up Rather Than Catch Up
Do you find yourself constantly racing to catch up on everything in your life? And, things just keep being heaped on to the mess? This is because
You Need Support
Let’s face it, all these things are easier said than done. Especially for someone who is super disorganized. So, I encourage you to seek support if you need it. Ask for help when creating new systems. Listen to advice from the professionals and follow their guidance. Find someone who will hold you accountable. Before you know, these new habits will help to create a life that you enjoy!